Each weekday, Rodeo Rick scours the web for the best and weirdest news headlines from around the world. We proudly present you with the best Redneck Headlines and the stories behind them.

Here are today’s Redneck Headlines:
#1 – HIS PLAN DIDN’T FLY
#2 – STICK IT, YOU THUGS
#3 – A COKE, BUT NO SMILE

HIS PLAN DIDN’T FLY

A California man who tried to steal a small plane at gunpoint couldn’t get his plot off the ground because he forgot to unchain the Cessna from the tarmac before attempting takeoff.

Troy Long went into the office at Compton-Woodley airport just outside Los Angeles and grabbed a fistful of keys, finding one set that matched a plane that struck his fancy. He got into the cockpit, fired up the engine and tried to take off, but found that something was holding him back not his conscience, but a thick chain used to hold the craft in place.

He was still revving the engine when cops arrived to yank him out of the pilot’s seat and into the back seat of a cruiser.

Source: KNBC

 


STICK IT, YOU THUGS

A pair of wanna-be carjackers in Washington, D.C, found that their getaway was anything but automatic after discovering the vehicle had a manual transmission that neither one of them could drive.

The men forced the driver and passenger out of the car and into the trunk, but brought one out to drive when confronted with the stick shift. While he drove them part-way to their destination, he bolted the scene, leaving them to fend for themselves and leaving his female friend in the trunk.

The carjackers tried to master the stick in one easy lesson, but failed and took off themselves. A manhunt is currently underway.

Source: Washington Examiner


A COKE, BUT NO SMILE

A Florida man is feeling a little less than bubbly after being arrested on felony charges for using a courtesy cup meant for water to pour himself a free soda at McDonald’s.

Mark Abaire was given a cup of water by an employee, but decided to fill it with soda at the fountain machine. When confronted, he refused to hand over the buck it would have cost and began cursing out the store’s manager.

Because he has a prior record, Abaire’s charges – theft, trespassing and disorderly intoxication – could earn him five years behind bars.

Source: WPTV

A LUMP OF COAL IN HIS SKULL

A wanna-be burglar in Georgia is in a ho-ho-hole lotta trouble after getting stuck when he went up the chimney without care during a heist.