Each weekday, Rodeo Rick scours the web for the best and weirdest news headlines from around the world. We proudly present you with the best Redneck Headlines and the stories behind them.

Here are today’s Redneck Headlines:

#1 – PUTTING HER FOOT IN HIS MOUTH

#2 – FIRE SALE AT THE DOLLAR TREE

#3 – HANDLESS MAN FINGERED

 

PUTTING HER FOOT IN HIS MOUTH

A North Carolina woman may face assault charges after trying to get a leg up in an argument with an acquaintance, by beating him over the head with her artificial limb.

Charles Maurice Talbert called cops to say that the woman, whose name was not released, escalated a fight over the purchase of groceries by punching him in the chest, then unstrapping her leg and hitting him with that. She blamed Talbert for the fight, saying he was “harassing” her and she couldn’t help but leap from her wheelchair to hit him.

Her dialysis tube became dislodged during the fracas, so she was taken to the hospital before being released.(Gaston Gazette)



FIRE SALE AT THE DOLLAR TREE

The nut doesn’t fall far from the tree - the Dollar Tree, that is.

A disgruntled ex-employee of a Dallas Dollar Tree store was arrested after he walked into the place, calmly poured lighter fluid on the shelves of one aisle, and setting it ablaze. Customers ran for the exits, as did employees, who called 911 to summon both firefighters and cops, the latter of which took Damon Cooper into custody.

Cooper used his Facebook page to explain that he acted because he’s “being followed, threatened, watched, set up, stalked, attempted to be committed, imprisoned, and much more by Dollar Trees Stores Inc., The Police Departments, The Fulton County Court, maybe more … This is a Federal Crime.” (DFWCBS.com)



HANDLESS MAN FINGERED

You’ve got to hand it to a New Mexico man who managed to get arrested for throwing rocks at the window of a KFC restaurant despite the fact that he has no hands.

The man, who speaks only Swahili, and came to this country as a ward of the United Nations, chased a stranger off the street and into the eatery where he was punched in the face by another customer. He left the area but returned with a rock the size of a volleyball, which he launched through the front window.

(KOAT)

A wanna-be burglar in Georgia is in a ho-ho-hole lotta trouble after getting stuck when he went up the chimney without care during a heist.