Each weekday, Rodeo Rick scours the web for the best and weirdest news headlines from around the world. We proudly present you with the best Redneck Headlines and the stories behind them.

Here are today’s Redneck Headlines:

#1 – DUMB CROOK GETS CLOCKED

#2 – COP COMES CLEAN

#3 – WHERE THERE’S SMOKE, THERE’S IDIOCY

DUMB CROOK GETS CLOCKED

A Florida man may soon be doing time for stealing time by swiping a clock off the wall of a police station where he was being questioned about another theft.

Cops spotted Michael Marquez and another homeless man arguing over the contents of a shopping cart filled with sporting goods, all of which turned out to be stolen. They were both hauled in for questioning in separate rooms, and when Marquez’s interrogator stepped away, the 34-year-old snatched a wall clock and stuffed it into his backpack forgetting that police stations often have surveillance cameras.

He now faces charges of petty theft in addition to the possession of stolen property allegation. (UPI)



COP COMES CLEAN

A Pennsylvania police officer is hoping he won’t be all washed up after being charged with breaking into a neighbor’s house to wash his clothes.

Jason Rocco was busted after the owner of a neighboring house grew suspicious about high electric bills being racked up despite the fact that no one was living there. He decided to scope out the scene and walked in to find the dryer running, with police T-shirts and uniform items inside, which led him to Rocco.

Rocco, who was suspended from duty, told police the door was already broken and he “just had to do some laundry.” He also asked for his clothes back. (WPXI)



WHERE THERE’S SMOKE, THERE’S IDIOCY

A Nebraska vandal is cooling his heels after he tried to set a fire at a local library — only to be arrested after calling 911 for help in escaping the blaze.

Joshua Hughes hid in the stacks of the University of Nebraska library at closing time, then took a match to a few books just for kicks but found he didn’t have any way to get out. Panicked, he called the emergency number for assistance, and was caught red-handed by firefighters.

(Kearney Hub)

A wanna-be burglar in Georgia is in a ho-ho-hole lotta trouble after getting stuck when he went up the chimney without care during a heist.