5 Things to Stock Up On Before The Spring Snowmageddon [SATIRE]
According to the Cheyenne National Weather Service, we are expecting a doozy of a storm! Up to 24 inches of snow in some places, with lots of wind and icy conditions. I recommend planning on staying home if you can help it, so here are some totally essential things to stock up on (not really, this is all satire.)
5. Flashlights
For the simple reason that flashlights are fun to make shadow puppets with when you're inevitably stuck in your house for far too long with your roommates and/or family. Bonus if you get a flashlight with a laser pointer attachment for extra entertainment value!
4. Dog Treats
Because if you have to convince your poor dog to head into the snow to do their business, there's going to need to be some bribery involved. Secondly, you can also use the treats to coerce your dog into being your entertainment if the snow knocks out your cable!
3. Candles
Not because the power is going to go out or anything, because it probably won't, but candles smell nice and can put the perfect finishing touch on a relaxing bubble bath when you need to de-stress from being on the road when people completely forget how to drive in the snow.
2. Sugary foods
Because sugar allows for a totally unnatural amount of energy, it might give you the push you need to finish shoveling snow from your driveway and sidewalk. Also, if for some inexplicable reason food becomes scarce, you've got more calories for less food. A win-win!
1. Wine.
Just Wine.
If you want to be actually prepared for the upcoming snowmegeddon, have no fear. The CDC has a snow storm preparedness list to make sure you're ready to weather any storm. You've got this. Especially if you've got wine.